CSR looks like game: Washington edition

Ed. Note - For those of you who enjoyed this series last year, we’ve decided to change it up for 2018. Instead of focusing our attention on the head coach of our opponent, we’ve opened it up to anyone affiliated with the organization. So, instead of “Jay Gruden looks like...” you’ll get a collection of jokes about other folks as well. We hope you enjoy this updated format. -BS

To get us prepared for Sunday’s game against Washington, the CSR staff decided to have a little fun by borrowing the ‘looks like game’ concept from The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz on ESPN.

Ed. Note 2.0 - The Looks Like Game is the best thing that anyone does at ESPN and it’s not even close. If you’ve never experienced it before I highly recommend it. Trust me.

Below is a collection of our best efforts to figure out exactly what/who people from the Washington organization look like. Feel free to discuss your favorite ones in the comments section, and you can even provide your own if you feel up to it.

Disclaimer: This is all in good fun. We’re not trying to hurt anyone’s feelings here, so if you happen to stumble across this and find your name mentioned, we sincerely hope you understand that we’re mostly kidding.

CSR looks like: Washington edition...

Jay Gruden looks like he knows about six other words besides football.

Jim Tomsula looks like he knows everybody at Dicks Sporting Goods on a first name basis.

Alex Smith looks like he models for watch ads.

Dan Snyder looks like an actor who can only get roles as a financial advisor in commercials.

Ryan Kerrigan looks like the guy that drives his brand new F-350 with the lift kit through the drive through at McDonald’s and has to open the door in order to be able to reach down and grab his food.

Jay Gruden looks like he would trust a 5-star Yelp review.

Jim Tomsula looks like he would be uncomfortable in a canoe.

Josh Norman looks like he has had it with DC area “barbecue.”

Colt McCoy looks like he pretends to be 19 to get into college parties.

Alex Smith looks like the clearance rack version of Kirk Cousins that Washington time traveled 20 years into the future to buy.

Dan Snyder looks like an attorney who refuses to be reasonable in a plea bargain negotiation.

Ryan Kerrigan looks like the meathead frat bro in every college movie ever made.

Josh Doctson looks like that younger cousin that is the grandparents’ favorite for no apparent reason.

Dan Snyder looks like he pays somebody to taste his food.

Jim Tomsula looks like he’s the guy Dan Snyder pays to taste his food.

Brandon Scherff looks like Des Moines, Iowa.

Jay Gruden looks like he’s wondering where Ferris Bueller went.

Alex Smith looks like he has four wives and 17 children.

Dan Snyder looks like he could be a Cabinet secretary.

Colt McCoy looks like the employee of the month at Hertz.

Jim Tomsula looks like he aggressively chews gum 24 hours a day.

Jay Gruden looks like a guy who goes to Applebee’s and orders a Yuengling, then talks down to his friends who are all drinking Bud Light.

Vernon Davis looks like the next Mr. Clean.

Alex Smith looks the actor who plays a high school quarterback who is clearly in his 40s.

Jim Tomsula looks like a guy who went the whole nine yards with golf equipment but is very bad at golf.

Dan Snyder looks like a guy who would claim to cut his own hair after going to an expensive barber.

Jay Gruden looks like the guy who can’t wait to tell you about his new lawnmower.

Jim Tomsula looks like a guy who won’t shut up about how good Blockbuster used to be.

Which ones are your favorites, Panthers fans?

Discuss.

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